Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in a hole. I think the whole "hole" feeling comes with being a teenager. You go through ups and downs in life. Your highs are highs and lows are ultimate lows. Half the time you're so confident in yourself that you're sure you'll never change, and other days you are so unsure of yourself and feel so lost and unlike anyone or anything that you can't even recognize yourself.
Lately I've been feeling a little lost. I'm not exactly what that comes from... Maybe I'm finally mourning the loss of complete normality. Maybe I am greiving the loss of my childhood. Maybe it just finally hit me that I'm living abroad and have no idea what I'm doing. Maybe I'm changing. Either way, the past few weeks, I feel like I've been wandering around like a lost little puppy - I'm not really sure who I am on the inside or what direction I should be going in.
The funny thing is, I've always been so sure of myself. And I still am sure of my decisions. But now I'm taking a look at myself. Am I really who I want to be? Am I the type of person I would want to be friends with? Can I adjust myself and my views? I'm not sure about who I am as a person anymore. I feel like I'm totally different. And maybe that's why everything feels so out of whack.
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